Life. Update.

I had a busy two weeks...

>Have baby - check!

>Sort through, organize and ship out nearly 200 pieces of clothing - check!

>Take Big Squish to have his first haircut - check! and sob!

>Watch The Bachelor {arguably the most important and meaningful item on this list} - check!

Life is finally slowing down a bit and I am loving it. I have actually had time {if by having time you mean squeezing in 4 minute blocks of silence here and there} to do things like make granola and shower. Three cheers for soap! Our new little nugget is doing well {if by doing well you mean eating every 2 hours around the clock and causing her mother to literally hallucinate from sleep deprivation} and is nearly 7 pounds. She is a tiny piglet! Squish is handling her presence beautifully, and is doing extremely thoughtful 19 month old little boy things like give her his bulldozer spoon and try to get her to smell his giraffe blanket. Bless. I am very proud of myself for getting my clothing orders sent out the same week she was born, and, best of all, I have fallen in love with Biz all over again while seeing him adjust to life with two children and step up to the plate as a husband and father in more ways than I could have ever imagined.

Here is a little slide show for the visual learners:

Somehow my lap has quadrupled in size and I now have 6 arms. I can magically fit Big Squish and the baby in it at once...while nursing...and holding my iPhone so Squish can watch videos of himself the whole time.

Yeah this is what happens when I try to fit cooking time into the day between nap times and feedings. At least it was really easy and not at all time consuming to clean up.

Squish has also decided that he prefers being carried around in bags. Awesome.

Before his haircut.

During...

And after :)

As I slowly get back into the daily routine of life {two children is more than twice as much work, by the way. Who knew?} I have one thing to ask of you in 2011, dear readers: What do YOU want me to post about? More fashion? Interior design? Motherhood and family? Cooking? Exercise and nutrition? Beauty? Do tell!

p.s. I have already picked out her {I will give "her" a blog name soon...} big girl room fabric...two years ahead of schedule...you like? Designer's Guild Barcelona roses. Imagine with bright neon fuchsia lacquer desk, ghost chair, some Jonathan Adler pillows, maybe some red and white chevron wallpaper on the ceiling...oh I can't wait!

It's a GIRL!

Image courtesy of Satisfying Spaces blog

Good news: She's here! And has already taken her first punch beautifully. Thanks, Big Squish. {Kidding. It was more like a very hard love pat}.

Bad news: Biz is sick + Big Squish is sick + 6 day old baby = Lord help me.

Recap: Sleep {I hardly remember this word already} is calling and my absence will continue for a while... I need my Super Mom cape. Stat.

10 Step Program To Having Kids

Anyone who is a parent will say that it is all worth it, but this little guide below is a very good view into a world with children. The steps get funnier and funnier as you go along {with my personal favorites being steps seven and eight}. I hope you laugh at this as much as I did!

LESSON ONE:

1. Go to the grocery store.

2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.

3. Go home and pick up the paper.

4. Read it for the last time.

LESSON TWO:

Before you actually have children, find a couple who does and berate them about their...

1. Methods of discipline.

2. Lack of patience.

3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.

4. Allowing their children to run wild.

5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners and overall behavior. Enjoy it because it will be the last time in life you will have all the answers.

LESSON THREE:

A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...

1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static {or some other equally obnoxious sound} playing loudly. Eat cold food with one hand for dinner.

2. At 10PM, put the bag down gently, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.

3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.

4. Set the alarm for 3AM.

5. Since you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2AM, make a drink and watch an infomercial.

6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.

7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.

8. Quietly sing songs in the dark until 4AM.

9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work, go to work, work hard and be productive.

Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

LESSON FOUR:

Can you stand the mess children make? To find out...

1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jelly onto the curtains.

2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.

3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.

4. Then rub them on the clean walls.

5. Take your favorite book and/or photo album. Destroy it.

6. Pour milk all over your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?

LESSON FIVE:

Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.

1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.

2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.

Time allotted for this - all morning.

LESSON SIX:

Forget the BMW and buy a minivan. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway all spotless and shiny. Family cars don't look like that.

1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it on the glove compartment. Leave it there.

2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.

3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat making sure you really take the time to shove them as far as you can down into the cracks. Sprinkle Cheerios all over the floor and proceed to smash them full force with your foot.

4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

LESSON SEVEN:

Go to your local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a preschool child. {A full grown goat is an excellent choice}. If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. No leashes allowed. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

LESSON EIGHT:

1. Hollow out a melon.

2. Make a small hole in the side.

3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.

4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.

5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.

6. Tip half of the remaining into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.

You are now ready to feed a 9-month old baby.

LESSON NINE:

Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying "mommy!" repeatedly. Important: no more than a four second delay between each "mommy"; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required. Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a car ride with a toddler.

LESSON TEN:

Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt sleeve or elbow while playing the "mommy" tape from Lesson Nine above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

Remember that a sense of humor is the most important thing you will need when you become a parent! {And thank you to my sweet friend - you know who you are! - for sharing this with me}

xoxo Sheridan
http://www.sheridanfrench.com
http://sheridanfrench.blogspot.com

Southern Accents Top 10 Kitchens

Light :: Elegant :: Refined

For some reason I thought I had posted these images long ago, but I searched through my archives and could not find anything on them so I am thrilled to share them with you!

I am still distraught {sounds a bit dramatic, but I am} that Southern Accents is no longer in print. It kills me! What a fabulous publication. They came out with photographs of their top ten kitchens a while back and I just ate them up. So different, yet all inviting and wonderfully cozy. Take a look and see what you think. Lots of inspiration! I would love to know - which one is your favorite and why?

Coastal :: Simple :: Blue

Contrast :: Variety :: Livability

European Country :: Rustic :: Expansive

Green :: Natural :: Refreshing

Neat :: Comfortable :: Finished

Red :: Modern :: Mix

Rustic :: Restored :: Open

Simple :: Stately :: Understated

Views :: Airy :: Open

Have a great week! Oh and yes, I'm still pregnant, she says with enthusiasm.

xoxo Sheridan

http://www.sheridanfrench.com

http://sheridanfrench.blogspot.com

Jewelry Crush :: Tom Binns

I was hoping to dance this baby out on New Year's Eve. Mission: Failed. I am going to try to keep up with blog posts {which I have already been failing miserably at} but forgive me if there are large gaps in between posts. My stomach is so big it is hitting the keyboard on this laptop as I type, and all I want to do is put my feet up, eat some Ben & Jerry's and watch The Bachelor. In my pajamas. Ok I lie. Not my pajamas because they don't fit. Biz's pajama pants and old t-shirts. Anyway, onto important sparkly things...

I heart faux gemstone jewelry. Not the stuff that people try to pass off as real, like fake Rolex watches and plastic double-C Chanel earrings, but obvious costume jewelry that is extravagantly fabulous and clearly fake. My favorite jewelry designer that fits brilliantly into this category is Tom Binns. Priced unbelievably high, none of his designs have made it into my closet, but a girl can dream! The attraction for me - other than the neon, of course - is the fact that the collection is luxury yet non-conformist at the same time. What a talent to be able to seamlessly meld those two together. Found at Maxfield, Neimans, Net-A-Porter, and other high end shops along those lines, he does have some precious gemstone pieces, but my favorites by far and away are the non precious pieces of the collection that really have a spark. They scream "look at me" and are certainly not for the shrinking violet. What's not to love about that??

xoxo Sheridan

http://www.sheridanfrench.com

http://sheridanfrench.blogspot.com