I am writing this upon hearing of the death of our second friend within the span of one week. One was 29 years old. The other was 41. My heart... I cannot hold back tears without thinking of their families. Their parents. Their young babies.
My heart has been changed. I am not going to continue working as much as I have been. Working as hard as I have been. Letting Squish play trains with our housekeeper so that instead I can respond to 32 emails and return phone calls and figure out when I have time to go to Dallas to find wholesale pillow inserts and check on the status of a shipment stuck in customs and fix the millionth thing that hasn't run smoothly with my website.
I am stepping back. Not stopping completely, but rearranging things so that I have more time to focus on those I care about most.
Talking to a dear friend this morning about our latest loss, she brought Psalm 39:4-7 to my attention.
Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered - how fleeting my life is. You have made my life no longer than the width of my hand. My entire lifetime is just a moment to you; at best, each of us is a breath. We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing. We heap up wealth, not knowing who will spend it. And so, Lord, where do I put my hope? My only hope is in you.
Life is not about what we obtain or what we achieve. It is about what we are given, or rather, what we are blessed with. Who can ever know when the last look into your husband's or child's eyes will come?
I came across a quote this weekend: At the end of the day, you can focus on what's tearing you apart, or what's holding you together. My family holds me together. God holds me together. So I choose the latter.
Sheridan, I'm so sorry for your losses. Life is a gift and can be taken away so suddenly.
ReplyDeleteI congratulate you on your decision to focus more on your family. It breaks my heart to think of all of the time my children spent with our housekeeper or at Mother's Day Out while I was flitting about town, shopping, going to meetings or having lunch with friends. My children are all grown now and I would give anything to get those years back.
Working and blogging will always be there but getting down on the floor and playing trains with Big Squish won't. I know that you'll never regret this decision to spend more time with all of your babies!
Congratulations on making your decision, as I'm sure it was difficult to make. I keep coming across that quote on pinterest that says something about when given a choice, choose your kids, there will always be work later (obviously the quote says it better).
ReplyDeletePS - Thanks for the Christmas card etiquette lesson - I did my cards right this year!
Reminds me of one of my fave quotes: 'You make a living by what you get. You make a life by what you give.' Sounds like you are right on track. xx
ReplyDeleteSheridan, I too am sorry to hear of your losses. I love the first quote you posted because as difficult as it is to understand the loss of someone we have to put our faith in God. Who knows, you may never had made your decision to slow things down with work if it weren't for your experience of loss this past week. God is always working for good. You can be confident in your decision and I comend you for living out what is truly important in life.
ReplyDeleteBest of luck to you!
Sorry for your loss, but I'm glad you made a decision. Family is important and at the end of life, that's who we think of, not the work we didn't get to. Blessings to yall!
ReplyDeleteOh I'm so sorry to read this. About the loss of your friend. And to hear that they had small children. Heartbreaking.
ReplyDeleteYou'll never regret a minute you spend with your loved ones, and that's a fact. Seems your choice is crystal clear now.
PS you look BEAUTIFUL in your sequin dress!
Sometimes the worst things are the ones that serve the biggest purpose in our lives.
ReplyDeleteYou are blessed to have the eyes to see whats right in font of you.
Chin up!
xoxoxo
Amber
Sheridan, my heart goes out to you and your loved ones....such a loss is really heartbreaking. But I'm a big believer that everything happens for a reason and, if the only reason here is for you to take a big step towards your family, then I believe there is something good in it.
ReplyDeleteI'm really sorry to hear about your losses, Sheridan. My thoughts and prayers are with you. This is a great reminder to us all that we must not take anything for granted.
ReplyDeleteSheridan, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. But, on the tails of what Amber Interiors said, sometimes our biggest growth is in times of struggles and suffering. May God bless your friends families, you and each of your sweet ones!
ReplyDeleteHugs~
Bless you and the families who lost their loved ones. So so terribly sad. We also lost a few friends and family friends suddenly recently. I know you'll enjoy this change of pace and answer to your prayers. God has a bigger, better plan that will fulfill your love of family and creative spirit. xoxo
ReplyDeleteI'm so, so sorry to hear about both of your friends. My heart breaks for their families. I loved what you said about working so much and that you are consciously stepping back and taking time to spend with those who are most important. Hugs to you xoxo
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry about your lost but any decision you make will be for the better. Not to say its a learning experience but be fortunate for those who you still have. l'll also be celebrating the life of someone I've lost. Its been sometime now but you'll be able to get through things once your heart comes to it.
ReplyDeleteMy heart really goes out to you, such losses are sooo difficult, losing loved ones is never easy. I really admire your strength and courage in making your decisions, and making it clear that family is more important than business. Imagine if the whole country was built on such a premise. Wishing you the best in all your future endeavors, whatever they may entail!
ReplyDeleteShannon, life is so precious and so short. I lost my 22 yr old son 2 1/2 years ago in a kayaking accident when he was a senior at Auburn university. it was graduation weekend. he took his last exam, went kayaking and had an accident on the river. it was also mother's day weekend. walker was lost on the river from friday til sunday, when the divers found him. it was mother's day, the safest day of my life. no one can ever give me back my child but no one can take away the memories either. God gets us through these hard times and in a strange way we discover the rhythm of life. we discover that nothing is by chance but God's perfect plan. I will pray for your friends and also for you, but make no doubt that God is in control. He will be there for the ones who need him. It is in the valley where we are the closest to Him. my prayers are with you!
ReplyDelete"Any journey of great love or great suffering makes us go deeper into our faith and eventually into what can only be called universal truth. Love and suffering are finally the same, because those who love deeply are committing themselves to eventual suffering. Those who suffer often become the greatest lovers." ~Richard Rohr
ReplyDeleteSheridan,
ReplyDeleteI never comment on the blogs I follow, but your post struck a chord. I made the same choice 15 years ago when I came home after working like crazy all day to find that my baby boy preferred the arms of my nanny over mine. Even though she was wonderful, I made the decision then and there that I didn't want him growing up that way. He's now a sophomore in high school and I'm so than,kful for every day i get to be there when he walks in the door. Trust when I say you will never regret your decision. Your children will be better for it. And so will you.
Peace be to you and yours. franki
ReplyDeleteI love your blog because you seem to have the same problems as the rest of us! I think the truth is, everyone struggles. However, most people make it seem like they aren't struggling. I think everyone has to let things go. Think of Martha Stewart. Yes, she is a CRAFT GOD. However, from all I've read she never had a good relationship with her daughter until recently. Same with Oprah...she was a TV icon... but she had no children. I think the "bigs" in the business definitely give up something too. Everyone does. It is truly a lie that you can have it ALL. You might can... but then you aren't really good at any of them.
ReplyDeleteI think focusing on your children seems like a good choice. I am doing the same right now and though it is challenging at times... I really do love it. They are making all their memories with ME. And memories are all you have once the moment leaves.
Hang in there, trust your gut, and be confident in your choices!
:) And please don't stop blogging! Yours is one of my favorites!!
I am so sorry for you, your friends and their families. Don't worry, given your passion, energy and style, work will *always* be there for you in one form or another. Go play trucks with Squish and thanks for the reminder to this working mom to do a little more of that with my kids!
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear about your friends and their families. Enjoy your time with your family and good look rearranging. :)
ReplyDeleteOur thoughts are definitely with you, Sheridan :) I hope everything starts to turn around soon. We're all thinking of you!
ReplyDelete